7 | July 19, 2020

7

Dear Eddie,

I honestly thought we were getting along. I thought we could have become friends. But after your most recent letter, I've begun to question a lot of things in life, and most of all, my life choices. Eddie, has anyone ever called you a bad dog? Because you are. You need to be taught some manners, and soon. Who goes about destroying the entire house like that? One must always be polite towards one's human. Be prim, be proper, be reserved - in short, be cat. But I'll be honest. This isn't the first time I'm hearing a pet destroy a house. And you'll be happy to know that I've just started something called ‘Pet Manners'. It's a startup, and I'm looking to raise money for it. But it seems to be getting quite popular. What it is, are a series of workshops that I, along with other ‘polite professionals' take for pets like you. It's a twice a week thing, and it's subscription based. I can offer you a trial class, just so you get a feel of the class, and see how it can improve your life. I do hope you'll accept my offer. Also, consider this my last letter if you don't.

Your estranged friend,

Sockington